.Gums to me.

I miss you. YOU.

2009-10-25T04:58:00.001+08:00

haiz....

i miss you so much..

and i am so tired. shall blog again. wen im in the mood of it.

heee...

mentels....

Dreams bout youandYOU!

2009-09-24T01:56:00.002+08:00

to you(S):

I had this wonderful dream that we were happy and living our life and caring for one another. You were there for me through thick and thin waters that we went through. You were always prepared and always ready for any situations. My life in that dream was so peaceful and so meaningful. Hw i wish that this dream would come true. Though we knew each other for a short time, Maybe faith brought us. i fall in love with you. nt your looks, nt your money, nt anything that u impressed me. But you love me for hu i am and cares for me and concern for me and treat me that im very special to you. Only you. But i did dream another which is rather nt comfortable to type it down. Cz, it is life and death situation. Cz i wld never wanna talk bout it. And i'l pray to GOD, that this wld nt happen. InsyaAllah. i love you hubby. Miss ya so much. cant wait to meet you soon. i know im suppose to sleep rite nw bt i just woke bcz of HIM! he came into my dream again. n i don't knw why is he appearing in my dreams. But heck! i love you so much lah.. hehehehe.....

to YOU(A)!!!:

i wld like to ask you personally but kinda stupid cz, dreams are made up by us or by our emotions and memories.(i guess?) But i kept questioning myself. Why does every time i dream of something nice and i see your face suddenly from no where into my dream. You were Sad and unhappy, You were alone and miserable. You were fill with riches, fame and Girls screaming your name. Then you saw me with him. I saw your tears slowly rolling down on your cheeks. I just look at you and smile back. Cz all i know that i have nothing with you and against you. I have forgive you but why do you keep appearing in that same dream, dat same incident, dat occasion. Bt why bugis? among every location... Why bugis?.. haiz... I guess only god knows why. Cz i myself dun no why.

You've been missed.

2009-09-23T02:18:00.003+08:00

I miss HIM!!!! aww...
Family loves you... 
So does ur wifey!!!...

xoxo...

Dangerous Obsession

2009-09-23T00:38:00.005+08:00

Whatcha thinkin' now?
Since ya out of town.
Thinkin' what she's doin?
Livin' up her life so you'll be cryin.

Wonderin' she's okay?
For a minute, thought she betray.
Cz ya hearts unsure
Wishing that she'll be right here.

Oh Baby,
You gotta let me go
let loose of ya ego
Cz
We never were together
So dontcha take it to much futher

This love is just another dangerous obsession
another obsession.
a dangerous obsession.

OMG! im BACK!

2009-09-17T00:22:00.003+08:00

Wooots wooots!!!... Gosh im back from my long hiatus. gee... it's been so long i've not been updating hor.. hehehe... oh yarh guess wad.. i have my own Internet modem like Officially.. hahaha. bt i've gt to pay up myself.. tee hee... oh well work work work... haiz... Hari Raya is coming and i don't know what's gonna happen. hmm... We'll see hw larh.. bt wadeva it is.. Im gg out with my beloved Rythm Rectifians outing for Raya.. heee.. More pics coming in soon. heeee.. oh yarh... Dear hubby, i miss you larh.. even though my prepaid is low rite nw, You are always missed by me always... tee hee.. muaackz.. much loves larh.. heeeee... okie. soon my blog will fill with poems and lyrics of my own. jyeap.. if anyone there's to steal my ideas you will REGRET it a lot for taking it. muahahahaha...

*Alrite Nazurah Noh do Ya thang and make it work...

Our cloud nine...

2009-08-27T04:45:00.000+08:00

Imma on this cloud and it's called the cloud nine
It felt so much LOVE and it made me mine
So this cloud right here is nothin' than the rest
Cz yourself is all u ever did best

Putting our past into that old chest
Lettin' it go and shall never we confessed
Cz this love baby just call me ya shawty
It's where we started it again in our history

I could be ya clyde and Ya shall be my Bonnie
Cz baby skip my heart and it went to the start
This feeling im into is not what i've been through
Having you here is all i ever wanted you

Our love will never fade your love will be my aid
You've turn my fantasy into Reality
Baby you are my star our distance mean so far
My lil heart won't stop beatin the misses that we're feelin

We are lovin it our cloud nine
this feelin that's in me feels so fine
we are lovin it our cloud nine

Livin' it up.

2009-08-18T03:41:00.002+08:00

Striving it slowly
Deep into the mist of the curiosity
Keep on movin'
No men stopin'
Coz im livin' it up
and leaving that Stuck UP!

Emotions mean women
Men mean devotion
Love is a mystery
no one can understand these theory

Some needs second chances
some went through these obstacles
so im leaving these life
cz it has hurt me like a knife

lettin myself
puttin' all on that empty shelf
so im livin' it up
livin' my life to the fullest and be there to stand up

STMF!

2009-08-17T02:33:00.002+08:00

STMF...

That is hu u are. To my perspection. Lies and Fakes. And these is wad i felt. Really. Had enuff of In love thingy. Im settling myself to Families and commitments.. No time for In love thingy, letting faith to come to me and letting my believe in love away. Guess i have to be on my own. Really did love you but u dun bother or concern. Enuff of said of wad i felt. No more hopes and dreams. All of it is just a CHUNK of lies and FAKES. much appreciated and much thank you!!!

applause on YOU!!!!!!

Un-Sang Melody

2009-07-27T03:52:00.002+08:00

Guess the angels and stars are done. but little ants and bees are otw to entering.. hmm... nt sure.. but we'l c about it..

Wootswoootsiiiiessss.... OMG!!! look at the time lah.. it's 5 mins to 4 AM. i repeat... 4 AM.. hahaha.. n im still not asleep though... oish.. what's up Zea.. what's up.... hmmm. well.. these past few days felt like im nt needed. seriously.. felt like our boat of canopy is gg to sink soon. Hmm.. Buzzing and wondering.. why?. i understand hu u really are. but it seems to me that it is clear.. that i felt like im nt needed at all.. These is wad im feeling. Though u think that im fine with it but ur wrong. i dun feel like we are.. hmm.. guess... people cld eventually judge us that fast huh?.. hmmm.. well.. we'l c how.. anws. u've been missed by me a lots than what u can imagine... but why so randomnly YOU have to come into my LIFE again. wht is past is past... I told you that i've moved on. i dun see my love life to be with you again.. Please understand... She is there for you... she is worry for you... please leave me.... i cant stand this anymore...

And and to you.... Where have you been wen i needed you. but you dun seem to bother at all.. i guess we could only last as friends.. or just a friend.... though u r somebody.. but at the same time... you should know what im thinking and feeling for you...

Deeply in silence, sadness, frustration and heartless for you....
Guess im falling out with you soon if you dun save me from the sharks that you left me drowning in the sea..... Have yourself a thought and you really hafta think about it... hu m i to YOU!!!!

UPPPPDATES!!!!

2009-07-25T04:00:00.002+08:00

kkaes... i knwo it's been so much hot hot hot topics and stories in my FAMILY and and Friends... Oish..... well peeps and fams, i just gotta go with tha flow... jyeap... NIWAES....

You have been missed by me DEAREST!!!!... Gosh i know it's been quite sometime that we've not been seeing each other. oh well... Both been busy doing their own thang.. jyeap.. and and... Good luck to dearest for his upcoming New albums and songs that he's dying to do it now but afraid he has no time for it... Well only a few bunch knows hu's dearest is anws... soooo... im taking this really slow... super slow... cause dun wanna make a fuss bout it.. jyeap...
NIWAEs.... missing the old tyms we use to had before you into this new wave that we are approaching.. and now.. wen im gg out with him.. well let's say that he has ta use his shades everywhere he goes.. hahaha.. haiz.. what to do beb?... hahaha.. So lately i've been busy teaching schools dance and Earlier on we were practicing for our upppp=coming shows thatis today.. hahaha.... like FINALLYYYY.. it is done la sey... hahaha.

Know what... i dun like making people hu im close to and dey slowly drifted away.. Just because of this we are drifted apart. Wadeva the situation is i still treat everyone as friends... Dont like the terms or the word that is... Enemy... ish... So beb... no heart feelings rite... But if this still goes ont his way.... Terpulang la kpd kamu... cause... im just going with the flows im attending too.. Sooo if it happends to be some misfits that wanna get through us.. let'em cz... im nt gonna do any but I know God is there to help anyone who truly believes in Him.....

Patience.........

2009-07-23T01:22:00.002+08:00

PATIENCE.........
still in PATIENCE.....

we'll shall see the outcomes....

*Decision is still on you.

Gimme gimme more...
gimme more...
gimme more...

lalala...
Slacking at MAC. cathcing things in life and updating rite rite KAT!!!!!
hahahahahahahahaha.
muahahahahahahahahaha

Chasing lights

2009-07-21T09:54:00.003+08:00

Guess the story is hot now, nut i dun see why or what is so important bout it. Redempting myself to God's hands and Insyaallah he shall give me Kesemangatan dan Keimananku. All this are a bunch of Syaitan's yg menghasut orang manusia di dunia ini, termasuklah aku. So by doing this, i started consolding myself to God. And only he knows what problems im gg through.

This is are some points of wad i did yesterday:

-Eating choc's late nite and the Moon was BULAT. jyeap. Been long that we have never update ourself in life.

-Agreements to the decision right now.

-Gg with the flow.

-Patience is in me.

-Courage is needed a lot.

-Missing you so much.

-Apology for nt meeting.

-Recession

-COme to think of it, im Naive.

-I LOVE YOU KAT!. muahahaha..

-ANUGERAH 2009. He's gg.

SO far this is what i was doing or thinking yesterday. Wow, you both are gg Anugerah 2009, COOL OR WAD... well im stuck in schools teaching dance today. Have a great time there aitez... ILYSM!!! M.Y!

*afraid to be commited. Jealousy is in the air.

Breathe Slow...

2009-07-19T04:28:00.002+08:00

taking things as slow as i could. I guess you deserve it well but guess wad, it's 1 year 1 month knowing you Mr A. and 1 month for you Mr B. Though i've gt this strong feeling that Mr B should leave me and be with someone that his fam's likes. But i prayed all my life to overcome this Obstacle that Dear God is giving. Though it hurts but only God knows my situation and feelings now. Lovin' you was everything to me.

Tetapi sekarang, i could see things how you are doing this to me. Thank you for hitting the rite spot your giving but it's not gonna happen to me. What goes around shall comes around for you dearest g. You don't know how strong is my love and what the outcomes shall be fall upon you. Reading this post makes me cry deeply in pain, Patience Zea. These are all obstacles for you in life. Now, it doesn't matters to me what you think you are doing.. I menyerahkan ini semua kpda Tuhan, Allah SWT. Faith lies on his hands and ONLY he knows who i shall be with and endure this situation. Terpulang kpda kamu. Go ahead what you like to.

My love for you is so Deep that i shall remember SMU and the Bright Full Moon we had on that faithful nite. The nite wen i first held your hands and the night you hug me like we never hug before. These shall always cherish in me. It doesn't matter what status you are but my reason for you is that i love you so much and what is in your heart and honesty that you show me. It doesn't matter what people say or what they think is good fr you and me... Let 'em be. Let 'em think. But we need to prove our ownself that we do exist in our love story.

anws.....

Happy One mnth dearie... I love you so much.. Today is the third day of his absence in my life. Missing him so much, But my love would always be here for you. Shall wait upon your return and shall wait for your call.. I miss you so much... If there is ever onething to change about you is "Nothing" heck the fame you have now, heck the fans you have, heck the people that is bothering. the importance is that I trully dreadfully love you and miss you so much and longing for your return and to hear your voice again. SO far yet so near in my heart. Shall love you no matter what. Have a great time there and do take care of yourself.

"the decision is now on you."

to dearest, and you...

2009-07-17T11:33:00.004+08:00

Today is the day that he is gg off.. gonna miss him so, but life still hafta go on. Lots of things in my mind that i need to settle. Ex-Schools(ITE Yishun), new school to teach in, Getting a qualification for my malay dance and getting "Ryhthm Rectify" to be a complete crew.

Oh yarh bout Rythm Rectify, lots of upcoming events and not sure if we are gg to taq part in any comps la. Cz our crews are somehw not enuff.. jyeap..
anws...

I am gg to miss you so much.. U'l be baq on 2 August. And i could see you again and see you perform.. Yeah!! hahaha.. let all your fans Cheer for your name.. hahaha... anws.. Taq good care of yourself and succed in wadeva you are going to.. may god be with you always... i love you so much.. MISSING YOU A LOTS AYAM!!!!...

please be baq home, safe and sound aitez ayg.

*only god knows hw much i really need you.

to you:

Im prepared for whatever the circumstance i'l be getting from you cause im not afraid of you and i know myself very well. Patience is the key to any success. SO if you are delightfully happy thinking that im in hurt or somewhat, you are wrong cause only God knows hw much i am. If this is the game your giving me, im ready for it.

"Shot a Bullet in your Mind, Here comes another NINE."

thoughts of you and you.

2009-07-15T01:44:00.004+08:00

been thinking, searching and wondering for truth, honesty and sincerity. nt knowing where to start or wad to do. Why did this happen and why do you have to do it? Hmm... Realise that we are some what sharing the same family and cousin. It seems that i have to overcome the pressure im getting. "Bersabarlah zea." Im not sure what you are thinking but i'm prepared for whatever the circumstances is. Secretives and more secretives. Guess i know who i stand for. Really am. This is wad im feeling and thinking bout you. Maybe perfectly match for each other but nt me in ur life. Guess i need to give the way to you. Im sorry for interupting your life. and i should have not confess my feelings for you at first. SHould have kept it and let it fade away. i should let you go and be free like the eagles. I shall always love you and support you no matter what happens. If we are, then we are. im letting you go. i love you...
im sorrry.

Let the shooting star pass by me

But let it lends into the Angels heart

For tye shall always for who tye see

But tye love shall never be left apart.

drowning in love.

"sedetik air dari mataku menitis,

kerna cintamu bagi agar memuaskan hatiku."

...

2009-07-02T03:27:00.004+08:00

Eve:
randomly said,
unsure,
loss confidence,
imperfection,
loneliness,
pretend,
responsibility,
idiotic,
lost,
Jealousy.
in love.
why?

Adam never seeks Eve, but seeks another of "hers" in life.

Adam:
Unsure,
Confuse,
betrayal,
unfaithful,
fear,
mistakes,
pleasures,
seduction,
obsessed,
disregarded,
skeptical,
hate.

Eve feels the pain for what Adam did. Still, he goes on without a notice or concern for Eve.

hello love

2009-06-30T03:58:00.002+08:00

Guess sooneh or later dey will know. It's no longer a hush thing for now.

ILY.IMY

Well TREATEN...

2009-06-29T16:50:00.002+08:00

Look yourself in the mirror,
Ask, who d 'ya think ya are;
Hiding all ya stupid minor,
Not knowing how dumb ya are.

Get this all in ya head
Don't go showing that 'cha are STAR
Go run the show, Let 'em know how swell ya Beat.
Den how's it feel ta be in those shoes of a REAL super STAR.

SO wad you know it all,
U've gt the dough go play some more;
Toss it 'round pick 'em all,
Next thang ya do is tell 'em shit lies more.

Get a grip,
Don't waste ya Tip.
Cz you are no where near to make it to my G Shit.
Let 'em know how ya do it,
Tell me What'cha gonna get when ya through with it.

Hush ya love

2009-06-29T03:53:00.009+08:00

We
Started out as a crush
Then moves on, fallin' in love baby
Keep it low, No one knows
So hush.
It's only me and you.
Keep it real, not a word
Take it slow, let'em be this way

Even we're far apart
my heart right here is lovin'you.


Our love shall never fade
Your love will always be my aid
You turn my fantasy
Into reality

Baby you are the star
Even our distant we are so far
My lil' heart won't stop beatin'
the misses that we are feelin'

SO...
Hush, hush ya love..
Hush, hush my love...
Hush, hush ya love...
Hush, I'm in love.

~weeee hours~
gd luck for today!
xoxo.

ECSTACY.

2009-06-22T18:36:00.004+08:00

Life is like an Ecstacy.
You pop it in, You're lost in your world of philosophy.

Confused between Reality
And Fantasy.

All you think is NOTHING
and more than Nothing.

Not emptiness
but Happiness.

Your heart beats harder
and Faster.

This is my Ecstasy.
Explanation of my only Ecstasy.

The stare brings you out of your mind.
So Out, that our eyes knew how much we find.

My Ecstasy is my life.
YOU shall always be mine.

"Lemas Melihatmu."

The Change.

2009-06-02T03:19:00.003+08:00

"Change is in me. Shall forget the past and never to repeat it again. knowing that repeating the same mistake would never move forward."

Im putting all the past back behind me. I would lke someone to know me through myself. Not any guys or exes hw was the relationship like to be with me. I guess getting a guy that i want is really hard. Im very fussy about wad kind of guy that i would like to get. Haha.

For now i have come to my conclusion. Because of you I am afraid to do it so. If this would never happen i guess we could have been happy together just like we did. Bt that is in the past and nt in the present. i think you have open my eyes to see wad's life is about with you. I knew you for a year. Bt it is the time for me to move on. I've made the wrg moved to see you again. Im in shame of myself. Should have ignored you then. My senses says that you will still be the same. shall do it again. I am never going to give you another chance. Once is enough for me. Forgive me for what i have done. Accept the change and thinking of myself now. If we r faithed then let it be. Cz im leaving to his hands, and it is left for me to find it out. This is life that he created. Accept it and cherish it. Cz we only live for one time. I never believe in reincarnation. If there is, i would never repeat the same steps i did in the past.

The Friday.

2009-05-30T04:11:00.002+08:00

The "FRIDAY"

today is like a screwed up day for me. seriously. It started off like this. a friend of mine(shall nt say he/she name) asks me to work at he/she place. I thought of like, sure why not. i need the cash anws. and that conversation we had was on thursday. So on the "FRIDAY". i hafto report to work at 1015am. oish. just to get training from some experience sales person. Bt it turns out that an unfaithful last minute notice just came out from "OWN" undergrnd thingy. So i ditch the work that my friend suggested and went off to deal some PROBLEMS. *(Im so sorie beb. Im under a legal contract and i cant escape it.) After settling some problems. Went to punggol Primary to assist my mum.(She didnt came along this time) SO went there teach the kids and didnt practice with any music.. Kids were so cute that they actually hum to themselves for the song. haha.. But there is one lil "ANGEL" uses my shoes and guess wad. my SHoe sole came off... SAD or WAD?... haiz.. dah la nk kene beli kasut baru... HAIZ......

SO..... after Punggol Pri. Went to mit up Haikal to make a move on to Republic Poly. During our journey, we did talk some things out about Understanding relationships and Single,Mingleandflings. (we know, but they dun know any.) tee hee~~. Reach at Republic watch the performance there, Momentum(if i spell it rite.) OMG. u guys all are so HOTTT!! kk.. And hw much i miss doing malay dance and Ballet. Haiz.. miss those times... and yarh... went to chill at a near by Mac. den went home. actually there is still a lot more but im just too lazy to type it in anw. hahaha... haiz..

*im feeling clueless of myself of wad would become of you if you still keep on doing this to us.
Time to mve on boy, The past shall always stays in the past. BUT mens like HIM/THEM. really nids one good BASH by all the women or men. A GUY frm Sengkang Punggol FC. Dun "feeling-feeling hensem" okie. i agree with u girl. hahahaha (evil laugh).

okie. dats about it that i wanna type anw. shall update more sooooneh.. I know my life is a BORING life. hahaha... only a handful knows who the real Nazurah Noh is.

*Mr JlnSUKA, i cant believe hw dumb you can be. ooopss... JGN Marah eh.

wheee me...

2009-05-25T15:55:00.002+08:00

greaaat... im bored at home and waiting for SAM to get herself ready... We are gg to mediacorp today and i need to get a nicey nicey belt
my belt nw like shit seh
hahaha...

oh well now SAM msn with me she says she dunno wad to wear.. hmm wear BIKINI ah beb..
hahaha
confirm people in the Studio would look at you den me..
hahaha...

kkaes...
while she is SIAP-ING.. i need to get another bathe.. Something wrg with the weather nw a days..
super hot la...

kk..
shall cam whore lots today and wadsoever la..
shall update more kkaes...

CYA SAM!!! HURRY kk!!

Been loved and noe PISSED.

2009-05-19T15:39:00.003+08:00

18 MAY 2009

The AIR is cleared.(maybe) Jyeah it was clear for me. GUYS like HIM/THEM should understand how women feels for them. Well heck. Why bother bout it. It's over. Hope you could get someone in life that agrees with ur EGOCENTRIC mind of yours. Tsk!. each us here has our own EGO. Oh well.. IT'S ALL OVER.

If you like someone, dun ACT like you like them.

ANW.
TODAY(19 MAY 2009)

I didnt go to school.. Hmm thot of stop gg. But to think again. Dont or maybe. haha. Journey is so far. Seriously. hmm.. and S.H. send me a monthsarry msg saying Happy 11mnth. but we are just friends. I have no intention to be in another relationship for the time being. well let faith come. dun have to find one. But it is time to change the way hw i live my life. Need to focus on things that i need to accomplish and get serious with it. No more hanky panky, playing around, get Busted bfs and Childish one who thinks they are mature. I'l take all of this into the past. And step into the future and Realise what mistakes i have done. Once i've done it wrong i shall never want to repeat the same mistake again. Once agaon Nazurah Noh declares a CHANGE in her life. No more happy goers around me or ggg htere. maybe...

Oh yarh A.D.C has changed to "Rythm Rectify." our motto, "Create recognition, Recognition Created." haiz... There is so much thing to type about but im just sooo so lazy to type it. I'l end it up here now. "Poeple like you shouldnt belong to this world."

omg...

2009-05-16T01:29:00.002+08:00

hahaha.. wen i read my blog bout my mother's day poem.. i wanna luff so loudly that my stomache feels like needles piercing in it. hahaha.. my poem is the SUPERB sia.. haha.. dear readers please luff if you think that it is lame or wadeva kk. hahaha. Lame me.. haha

anw..
wad i did today.. didnt went to skewl again n went to edit musics. and and and im single... SINGLE damn it.. hahaha.. like jyeah.. haiz.. forget about relationship la zea.. just concentrate in wad u want in future.. kk. this is a self motivate session for me now.. okie im kind of lazy to type nw.. and i dun know why my hand is feeling so numb... hmm.. i'll blog more bout tomorrow den. Oh yearh tomorrow is gg to be the interview with "JUS" at cairnhill cc. hmm.. wonder what's gg to happen there tomorrow.. haha. shall blog more sooneh.. kk..

Happy Mother's Day

2009-05-10T04:57:00.003+08:00

To all dearest mum's out there. Happy MOTHER's DAY.

To "Ibu", im sorry for all the years that i've been behaving badly towards you please forgive me and accept my apology, halalkan la semua yg ibu sudah diberikan. Izinkan la zea k Mummy. i love you so much eventhough i've been bad... i still do respect you as my mum. Muack...

love you a lot...

I was the seed

You planted me

You water me

Then i grew out of me seed

The first cry

The first touch

The first Child

The first new-life

I became a seedling

You became aware of me

You checked on me

My small leaflets spread wide open, eventhough i was still small

Months of crying

Months of love

Months of care

Months of you singing it to me

I slowly develope

I grew talller

I felt different of myself

I see you unaware of me

Years of suffering

Years of Understanding

Years of Obstacles

Years of forgive or not

You oblige me

Put me in a POT

Surrounded by soils..

Seeing weird strange scenery

I was left to understand myself

Knowing who i am

Understand the situation

Go through red lines that i've never been told

As i grew,

and kept on grewing

i slowly bacame a PLANT.

Just a plant

Didn't had any flowers

Just a young plant.

You still water me

You still care for me

You left me to understand

You look at me and just stare

Im still a plant

In a process to be a tree.

I dun noe wad tree i am

till i reach the time.

TAKE this!

2009-05-04T21:47:00.000+08:00

Poisonous and Dangerous

2009-05-04T01:37:00.002+08:00

What made you think that we are the poison.

No one in this world is perfect.

NOT EVEN YOU!.

You think you are always right?

Oh hear me well.

You dun even know hw to threat them right.

You made use of them and then you throw them away.

THAT IS YOU!.

Guess wad?.

You are the poison and the SERPENT that sting us deeply,

and slowly bleeds inside.

YOU are the reason to us all.

*Note to every girls.

Be aware of guys or men like S-H.

Never judge a book by it's cover.

A lesson for me.

and a lesson for u.

I believe in KARMA. What goes around comes around.

If u think that im the one to blame for the past.

YOU ARE WRONG.

look yourself in the mirror and say it loud.

It's your FAULT!.

you made me lost your trust.

you made me hated you.

you made me hurt deeply inside

and outside.

So you think we are poisin.

YOU ARE SOOOO WRONG!.

Get a GRIP boy!

i guess you never love me at all during those times.

I know why.

Cz im boring and too busy.

Den next tym...

Dun freaking ask me for that stupid question that you WANT me!!!.

ARGGH! this is the last time i'l be talking bout you! i would never wanna know or hear bout you anymore. cz deep inside im still bleeding for what you had done to me.
THX!

SpinthebombaySaphirebaybeh!

2009-04-23T01:05:00.002+08:00

haiz... life has rather been lots of ups and downs... thinking abck what is the past would remain as the past and would never return again.. I guess certain guys are STMF and girls shall fall for it easily. a snap of their fingers she melts into him.. Not all guys.. So watch out girls.. AWARE of guys like these.. they are the most Dangerous species among us... But i belive in Karma. what goes arnd comes around. Maybe my karma has made someone satisfied... and so i shall wait for mine.. argh stop talking about this crap... it over anw.. It's that bugger who made everything worse.. oh well...

Well about my friends circle... benn growing stronger and better. knowing each other mmore closer and deeper. but i miss one of them. i dunno wad made u think i've changed. im doing wad is right for me. if you think im diff. it's okie. just enjoy what you have and dun get into trouble. hmm... bout boyfie.. we are 1 month anni. our love gets deeper each tym i see you. and i truly love you a lots... i dunnoe where did the love come from but you really open my eyes and see the real world about life. Talking to you and being there for you is what i want to stay forever.

well... this life is full of ups and downs and karma's gg on.. but what the circumstances is, we have to go through it. that is life for me. appreciate for hu you are. focus in things that you love to do. follow the road to success...

J-YEAH for me!!!

2009-04-05T13:33:00.003+08:00

alritey!.. i recently got my job people. im workin in Cotton On(Temp staff) Got my card but spell it out wrgly... "Noorazwa SIti Nazurah" pfft! wth.. but heck.. i've got the job Bebey!!! jyeah!!! hmm i have this strong feeling that im not going back ta schol. i think. coz.. i tried ta check up my course timetable in ITE yishun didn't came out. hmmm.. i really got this strong feeling that im not making in into the course that i want soo much.. I should have listen to my heart and follow it. I dun have ta listen to that GUY who says that ITE Yishun is a school of boys.. and lots of stories there.. ArggH! i dun give the shit. The most important is that i wanna taq that course and do it well.. okie!!! anws... OMG! im working.. tee hee.. If you guys wanna see me come to Parkway Parade Body On kk. im there. tee hee.. oh william got in too.. He's in Tampines Mall.. coooliio!.. haha... Syafiq now tuition teacher. hahaha. wth.. haha.. anws.. each of us gonna busy with work and school soooneh.. but Dearest Bestie fren of mine, Why do you have to do to me this way. y? is it because i've not been helping you out in your SYF and says that i've changed because of him?. Pleasee... im not. im still me. The "Nazurah". still concern bout u and still worry for you. I still dun get it why do you say that i've changed. seriously... why?... im still me... But for now. u have totally changed and ignored me. I felt hurt and dissapointed of myself.. is this what you want ta see the best frenz to sink down and to be gone for ever. haiz... i dunno what you are thinking.. cz now.. everything is settle n here you are avoiding me. WHY!... haiz... enuff of my complaints bout it.. i had enuff....

2009-04-03T03:32:00.002+08:00

"this life is full of darkness and a slightly ray of lights."

times when we are sad.
times when we are happy.
times when we feel glad.
times when we need sorry.

"we gotta make it work"
~(neyo-Make it work)

SPEAK UP!

2009-04-03T03:14:00.004+08:00

well it seems that u r avoiding me.
thinking wad have i done wrong to you?
givin' those cold shoulders to me.
where did i go wrong now?

coz of him i made u dis way?
coz of him our bonds are apart?
coz of him we didnt speak up?
coz of him you ignore me now?

where do i go wrong?
SPEAK UP!
why do you have to do this?
SPEAK UP!
How can i put this together?
SPEAK UP!
What is your reason to this way?
SPEAK UP!
who am i to you now?
SPEAK UP!

WHAT I'VE DONE
i face myself to crash out what i've become

WHAT I'VE DONE
Erase myself to know my mistakes.

im in shame, sad, anger, dissapointed.
WHY?
what?

please tell me...
please...

cz i cant take it anymore.....

"Lepak" tym!

2009-03-31T04:03:00.013+08:00

There's still a lot more la. but im just effin' lazy ta put it up in here. freakin slow seh.. haiz.. anws.. so jyeap. my weels has been lepaking until the 13 april where i would start school in ITE Yishun taking my course Aerospace technology. n. I love you baby!!! may we last long aitez!.. let this be last for me and you. And besties.. im sorie if i you think i have changed in a certain ways.. im not aite.. totally im not.. I missed you guys man.. miss the TS tym and the Fa's clan. seriously.. hmm.. missing those tym so much.. anws.. Sam Bebeh.. dun stress aite.. me and Sexy is always here for you no matter what. please pweety please call us k beb. if any problem or wad. dun keep it beb... Love ya so much.. and SEXY.. it's your decision beb. up to you. it's ur choice to wait or forget it. kk.

deeply.in.love.

2009-03-23T01:40:00.004+08:00

220309

This heart , it beats
Beats for only you..

My heart is yours...

today is the day where i have fallen in love with you. i miss you so much. you prove to me that how sincere you are to me. being responsible to me n my mum. i really appreciate you a lot. i love you...

"who else am i gon' lean on when times get rough
who's gonna talk to me on the phone 'till the sun comes up
who's gonna take your place, there ain't nobody better
oh baby baby, we belong together"

freakin ass!

2009-03-10T02:20:00.004+08:00

thx fuckin million a lot!,

it hurts me a lot.

i cant take it anymore,

please leave me.

LoveADC!

2009-03-09T17:27:00.004+08:00

people of ADC.

We had tried our best and show that we could dance like them. The next comp we would try our best again and improve our dance skills and music baybeh!!! jyeah! This is our first time ever gg into the comp together. We would try our best again. and let the ADC rise and shine into the scene aites! Go ADC! Go!.. Dun give up people. This is just the beggining. kk! Love you people.. practices would be up sooooneh kk. LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!

OMG!

I dont know what im thinking right now. Only sexy knows why... haiz.. should i beb.. hahaha. then we can call ourselves the pem-busted clan. tee hee.. damn shit you know.. hahaha. i just wanat to be FREE!.. heee.. k lor. lazy to type alredi.. Soooneh to update and put pics. my blog boring ah. no pics.. kk. sooooon!!! oh. go to lenny blog. c ADC pics.. kekeks giler seh.. tee hee...

love u Lenny.(3/4 man) tee hee.. love u beb!

like Jyeah.

2009-03-03T04:57:00.004+08:00

OMGawd! haha.. im still awake at this hour... hahaha. Eye bag coming in soooooneh! tumtumtum!

hahaha... GREAT finally we are done with the dance last sunday! FINALLY. haiz. full force in da house.. yupsy!... anws. finally i put in the tagboard and added links to pmy sweet peeps. haiz.. k lah. maybe later i'l type more kkaes.. tee hee.. SAM ask me ta change my style og blogging. k lor. i'l put more interesting pictures kk. Here comes cam horing peeps! tee hee.

*IMPORTANT!:

ADC is having their first ever dance comp. Support us by wearing Pink or black outside o Plaza Sing @ 3pm. kk. Ur support is very precious to us! love u all.

yes!

2009-02-27T00:30:00.003+08:00

I love u la beb! thx fer helping out solving problem in my blog!

lyk J-yeah! finally i feel so satisfied with the blog k. Thx SAM. love u lots! tee hee. anws. today like woke up late. and was late for the appointment to meet aunty Som for the Sriwarna thingy. I need ta get that cert for dance so i could go other schools to conduct lessons. yup. so after that had went to KCS to conduct class with mummy and gosh, SAM "SWEAT" like 3 times she told me. HAHA! love you beb! tee hee.. anws. after that went to Banquet to eat with mummy and SAM but the food not that nice. WASTED!. then went to SAM's hse. Talk about rubbish and what to wear this Saturday show at Victoria Theatre. Guess wad! SAM damn Hot sia! SHe transform seh!!!.. tee hee.. SAM preety la hor!!! tee hee... den boyfie nt happy with me cz didnt get to mit him up. Im sorry k. it's just so long i've nt been with her and btw we nid ta talk about our dance work. OMG! Dancewrk 09 is like freaking nxt week. SHIT! haiz.. not so sure seh.. feel so not sure.. ithink everyone knows why. haiz.. beb cannot tahan ah. Supe Duper scraed now. haiz.. wadeva it is. we must show and do our best for the comp. kk peeps! anws. now at home. missing him. i know he is hating me. im the one at wrg. haiz.. im freaking childish k. haiz.. i dunna la.

*i must really learn how to give and taq. be responsible for things and do what i must do.

GO ZEA! GO ZEA!

aite then. i'l end it here. nitez people. & good luck to you too beb!.

imy dear!.

Stupid Love!

2009-02-22T00:58:00.003+08:00

Should have done it earlier.
but it is too late.
Dun think about it too much.
Cz it's pointless about it.
I can forgive, but i will never forget.
These tears won't stop.
it would never be stop, ever, again.

Respect, love and honesty

2009-02-14T02:47:00.005+08:00

These three are the most important values for every individuals.

regardless of race, religion or gender.

Why these three?

let me tell you why.

first is RESPECT.

-to those who is important in your life.

(Family, life, relationship, friends and enemy)

-to those who needs more than we do.

(the elders, the young ones, the unfortunate and the "blessed" ones.)

-to the dignity and security of women.

-to those who needs more attention to the one they love.

second is LOVE.

-to someone you care so much.

-to people who is around you.

-to love the life you are living in.

-to accept for who you are and where you come from.

-to believe in ur religion.

-to understand and protect the word love in the relationship

lastly, HONESTY.

-to be honest in what ever you do or say.

-to be honest to people you care, love and and think so much about them.

-to be honest in life.

-to be honest in realtionship.

-to be honest and admit for what you have done.

this is what i understand about these three values in life. i know there are more things about this. if you think im nothing above from these three, please think again.

*im sad, worried, scared and angry. why do these things has to happen. is GOD testing me for my patience and anger? WHY?. i know i have done a lot of sins. but why till this incident happen to me. what are they trying to do to me. Jealous? to Satisfy their revenge? WHAT?. what more do you want from me. You want him?!... ask him urself!.

The word "Trust"

2009-02-07T03:39:00.000+08:00

Today is a lesson for me and maybe a lesson to everyone.

(Trust- firm belief in reliability, truth, ability or strength of someone or something)

Let me elaborate in my own word and thought of the word, trust.

To me trust means putting your 100% positive thoughts to someone that you really love and care for it. Hoping the He/She is serious in this relationship. The word trust could be a dangerous meaning too. Once broken, it is difficult to piece up everything all back together as it was use to be. Those happy days before you and the one that you love had together had somehow turns into ashes and slowly those beautiful moments that you had has turn to dust and slowly fades away. Trust is not just any word that could just say it out freely. It is word that express some ones emotion of Happiness and sadness to me. Once you were happy. Next thing you knew, the trust is gone. Bcz. someone or maybe you yourself has broken the spell of trust. Now it is difficult for us to trust those whom we love. This has to take really long, i mean really long as in months or years... Once you have broken it, it's hard to put it back.

i hope reading this blog is something to you why im like this. Difficult to trust you in wadever you r doing. it's not that i dun love you. it's the trust that is hard to put it back all together. after you have read this blog. im sorry that i have to delete in wadeva it is in friendster. if in relationship has no trust for each other. don't have to continue on like this. maybe. it's not the time yet for us to be a whole. im sorry. The word trust to me for you is just to difficult. im sorry.

im gg back to school in april. And i NEED full hopes of myself.

2009-02-04T02:36:00.001+08:00

im starting school soon. like few more months to go...

im gg to ite yishun taking aerospace technology. OMG! can you like belive it. haiz.. like damn leceh seh.. hahaha.. anws.. im sleeping late again.. everyday actually. totally late. i dunno y? Maybe all those bad dreams im having recently. Not nightmares bout ghost or monsters. but about My life with Boyfie.. don't know what's going on lately. seriously.. dreams that i thot it would never happen. but im afraid dat it will happen. haiz... i hope this won't come true at all. i just hope. hoping that this is just an illusion. I just hope it wont happen. It's hard to explain it here. but it hurts me a lot and it's bad for my health too. not enough sleeps and not eating proper food everyday. kept on thinking and thinking. hope this would never come true. I just hope. I hope you wont hurt baby. i love you so much that i just don't want things to happen.

2009-01-28T03:01:00.001+08:00

Okie.

First thing first.

I SERIOUSLY NEED "HELP"

on my blogskin layout...

it is FRIGGIN' not what i really like.

Oh damn shits..

Seriously..

okie.

back to blogin' bout me.

MUA.

This is the longest entry that i had ever done.

Okie these past few days. i've been busy teaching schoools.

seriously.

Ain't kidding people.

i'm a dance teacher ya'll..

hahaha

okie. just luff at me if you want.

anws..

I've got soo many things to...

YELL.

SCREAM.

CRY.

PUNCH. (dont know why?)

SACRIFICE.

EXPLAIN.

GET RID OFF.

TO LOVE.

TO HATE.

SO many things to talk about but so little time for me to type.

Well.

Let's talk about "My bf".

Yeah! i was so happy and excited to see him again.

Hoping that i could spent more tym with him.

But on that Friday itself,

My long Long distant cousin Father passed away on that day.

Well i dun noe her that well anw...

and yeah... Mum was in tears cz it's her cousin.

Den she came to me and bros..

"Wad happen if i die.. hu would bacakn Surat Yassin (If i spell it corractly.) for her.

I was really sad wen she says that and angry at that moment.

I wasn't happy with it.

She sounded as in..

Unhappy that her children didnt know hw to read the Quran and know anything more about "Islam".

Well im not here talking bad about my religion.

Im just angry that everytime that she is angry she sadi that she is "Menyesal" that she didn't get to send her kids for religious lesson. In an angry tone of voice.

and one thing about her. she wears a 'Tudung'.

She doesn't even pray. Sometimes but it's like barely seeing her praying.

I don't know why is she like this.

anws. back to topic.

me and bros just kept quite and listen to her.

anws. we're not that close realtives.. i guess..

never knew her family that well.

but ptiy for her.

and yeah..

ask mummy that i wanna go out and spent more tym wit bf.

she said can but has to b home at 8 pm.

Can u b-lieve it!.

8 pm.

where he only books out at 5 pm and reaches my place at 6 pm. doesnt she know how far the journey is. and how much i love him?... She's just driving me insane.

How could she!.

i dun no what to do. but to go against it. cz i have planned it together with him and i accept his mum invitation to come for his welcome baq party at his place.

So i just did it. den she gave me a time limit.

Lyk...

WHAT?...

told me to reach home before 12 she said..

i was like.. no way..

and i go against it too.

So i told mum the very last min that i was coming home much much more late at night. so after dearest baby sent me baq home in his brother car, mum was waiting her room and started accusing things about me and bf.

She said, i like to go home late everytime.

i mean... wad the ****. I've been working with ehr. helping her everyday. cant i have my own time with my bf. is it soo hard for ne to spent time wit the one i love so much. at least my bf knows what is Islam not like 'Ayah' k ibu...

den she blames my bf to bring me home late. i told her off saying that dun accuse people any how k. it was me dat wants to go home late. i inform her. at least i inform her.

But still not happy.

what she wants...

what! ask me to go marry wit Zairil's brother is it. k dat one another story later that i would be talking about.

Back to this. my mum thinks that in my head is always rite...

well i dun think that way k.. at least i dun go for guys who has standards and money.

i go for religion.

cz without these after life..

Money and standards would never go to the grave with us.

Get it!.

Why do you hafto be sooo...

haiz! irritating now a days.

it's not that i hate you...

It's just that ever since uncle tapa has been so kind and understanding to me, u started talking to Fathin's mum about this. Why?.

i am never gg to married to ur decision even though if u r gg to say that it is for our family sake. Im not. I wanna seek happiness wit the one i love and stay normal and reach for our goals in our Marriage life. not wit someone who is into money and doesnt know Religion that well...

dun you know hw irritating that is.

then the next day. it was Saturday. we went for her cousins funeral. ended early arnd 5 pm. thot of meeting baby. But dearest "mummy" dont allow me. cz wanna spent family time. i felt pissed off.. cz it was in my organizer that i die die wanna spent more tym with him before he goes off... she die die dont allow me. i feel so Chi-Bay... irritated. Uncalm, Unhappy, anything that makes me or feel or say things that is related to anger. cz i was freakin angry wit her. that i really show her a big bad attitude infront of her and infront of everyone. I dun like ut. i hate it. Dun you know that.

if im having achild. i'l b giving him or her a full support of who dey want to meet or hu they want to spent tym with. as long they show us hu they are going out with.

She said herself that she is an out-going modern mum.

Yeah rite..

hiaz...

no offense k mummy.

but i cant take it anymore.

If you my brother is reading this blog go ahead tell ibu k. cz i know you guys are the most KPOS people and would never shut ur mouth about peoples life. Wait till u have a serious relationship den you know how i feel.

when she didn't allow me... i strted feelin' so shitty at Fathin's hse. i felt sorie for her for not talking to her. Sorie cousin. cant help it. He's in NS.

i tried to control my childish anger and decided to help my aunt in the kitchen. By chopping vegetables and tries to forget the problem. I know my dear is not happy about it. i know. i feel so sorry for him. he was really looking forward to meet me though.

Then the next day. Sunday.

It was the eve of CNY. I straight forward told my mu that im gg out with bf. that's it. i just went off and met him. I know she wasn't happy. cz she wants me at home to cook for the family outing which was a last minute thing at Fathin's hse yesterdae. She thinks for herself... **** her k. just **** her...

I was so un happy that i didn't went out eating with the family in the morning. so i just action sleeping then woke up arnd 12 pm. Dey were gone. so met abg yunus to take some vid to do editing at home. den meet dear baby at Kallang platform. as soo happy to meet him. all my problem that were in head was pushed aside and just thinking of us and the day we had. we walked like from bugis to orchard the whole day. Watched " Bride Wars" with him. it was nice. really girlish story for him. but too me it's nice. Baby bought a new bag Crumpler for his second tym after getting his pay frm NS, Army. He i sone luck guy man. But i told him. to save money. For future use. den he says. yarh.. so that i could marry you cepat2... hahaha.. he really release my whole stress in life. without him my heart is like incomplete. He is everything to me and so he thinks that way too. I'm his, His mine. cnow 7 month swith him. He has break his record in his relationship. and decided to stay long with me forever till the day has come once we get married, get children grow old together and after life. I love him so much, so touch and will be missing him so much wen he has to go baq to camp.

Den dear baby accompany me to walk from PP all the way to my family last minute planning at east coast. haiz.. den saw mummy fce action happy infornt of me.. haiz... baby knew the whole story about it. he felt guilty i told him that he is not. My mum is just feeling not rite. n i dunno why?.. anws... Baby sent me off halfway den gave him my last kiss and a tight hug for him. From his face i could see that he wasn't satisfied with the time we spent out together. he wants to see me more often that ever. i know deep down inside he loves me so much that he couldn't stop thinking of me..

Den met dearest mummy and cousins. Only Fathin and his brother. wh like had the most BORINg family day outing. Seriously. im not kidding you. we're suppose to have our greatest time to have fun. but turns out our mums are not that going at all.. so we knew wht each of our mummy character is and how unfair they are. they are so not like tha family that we sse on east coast... SOOO not the same... haiz... dunno what else to say.

sooo had the most suckiest night ever... me and cousin got scolded for merayaping at Mcdonald. Just because i didnt want to change at a dirty toilet nearby. we went somewhere far. a 30 mins walk. but it is worth walking. met friends and long lost buddy there. hahaha. crazy... hahaha.. before that i read the msgs what Fathin's mum sent. Very hurtfull for me. cz it is about me. she thinks that im turning her child into a wildchild. im not k. we were like that. we like the things we do. im not even teaching her. haiz... damn sian sia...

k this is like the longets blog entry that i ever type...

and my eyes are getting more sleepy each tym i type. hiaz.. oh well.. let me have my rest first and continue blogging more the next day.. sorie for the super uper long entry. Ya lah.. long tym never update wad. what to do. haha... oh well.. gtg..

update more bout moi life soon ya'll.. Good morning people. Nazurah is sleeping now.

I love you baby. i miss you so much... I'l be waiting for you dear. i love you sayang...

muackx....

Livin' my life.

2009-01-14T01:42:00.001+08:00

Ok. it's been long that i've not been updating my Bloggies.

Internet was down at the moment. like yarh.. haiz..

oh well.. Dearest boyfie went to Camp alredi.. missing him so much.. So was his mum..

hehe..

oh well.. we need patience in life anws...

Well met Nora... Belo best-friend ever.. Long tym neva go hanging-hanging..

talk a lot and see nice clothes but never buy anything yet.. hehehe..

oh well.. don't know really what ta do after graduation..

thot of pursuing dance. hmm...

asking mummy to bring me in to Som Said performing Arts. Just to get the cert. hmm.. if possible la. But at the same time she ask me to get a stable job and CPF. Bcz it is veh important in life.

Hw ah.. wanna work or dance?.

Dance got full money but no CPF.

If work office Cargo... comfirm got one... hmm.. we'll see hw lor.. nid ta support family at the same time.. hmm..

It seems that im completely busy nw adays... not sure what to focus on...

But i really wanna open up my cupcake business online.. been doing it a lot during my free time...

hmm.. gt ta think of a way... yup...

Hope my future won't be corrupted lor..

InsyaAllah i will try my best to support the family...

And thanx to Nora for good advices and a listening ear and my Sista wanna be beb. You have been there for me... Love u lots&lots&lots.

Really nid ta safe our money for the STUPID Grad seh.. leceh giler... hahaha..

anws.. cant wait ta go shopping with you again beb.. hehehe...

and i miss Him badly though,,,

i wonder what is he doing in camp?...

hmmm..

anws syg.. i love you so much.. miss you...

2009-01-01T05:20:00.000+08:00

not in the mood to post up any today. well did had some fun at boyfie's place. celebrating his Grandma's b'dae.. Which is like his family is sooo cool. but anws.. Had lots of fun, tired, sad and getting more sad. cz he is leaving me soon. NO!!!!!.. okie seriously. i have no mood at al rite now. GTG.

Luv ya baby.

Im gonna miss you so much...

The Past and Hello 2009!

2008-12-31T03:46:00.000+08:00

Well let's start...

1. In the Early January... I had a 6 months relationship with Issamudin Ismail. I'm sorry and i forgive you.

2. Didnt went out to club much this year.

3. Met like lots of new friends

4. Had great performance and tons of lots of performance i say.

5. Met this cute guy Syed Haziq after my 2nd last exam. (He was searching and begging for me my number.) I know during that tym i have a bf. but i dun noe y i gave it to you.

6. Then went out a lot with him.

7. Get scolded by Issammudin for no reason.

8. Get irritated by him telling me that he is gg off studying.

9. Shock to hear and see what actually really happen in my relationship with him. Not u baby.(Syad Haziq)

10. Den dumb that guy. But i forgive you.

11. Got to know more about baby, Syed Haziq.

12. Get into serious relationship.

13. Now. Loves him more and happy to be with him for almost 7 months.

14. Soon im gg to miss him..

15. He is gong for NS next year.

well basically i talk most about my love life here. cant stop thinking bout u dear. Im gg to miss you.. No matter where you are or what you do.. I would always be thinking of you...

So now. my resolution for 2009.

I would like to change myself to be a better person in life and be responsible for things. InsyaAllah i would last long with my baby. Hope that our relationship could last forever dear.. Lovin you was the greatest life that i would like to spend my life with till death do us part. i love you sayang. I wold always love you...

2008-12-31T02:11:00.001+08:00

Crazy times in the Bus.

We're on the way to Melacca Baby!..

hey babes.. we had lyk freakin long journey and it is like 4 hours.. it's shits man.. hahaha.. at the same time.. been listening to the music that i love so much n that is "Make it Work." im lovin' it. And missing him much.. so much okie.. hehe..

BTW. we like slept and slept and slept in the journey. seriously. and my freaking "Adik-Angkat", Hazwan. Damn he is annoying.. he thinks his voice "SEDAP" gilers. haha!.. SHit arse Adik!. But u rox my Stockin!.. haha..

anws..

MIss you so much syg!...

i love you...

I cant stop thingking of you!

OMG! im BACK!

2008-12-30T02:09:00.000+08:00

IM BAck!!!

and i dunno where ta start...

well.. during the journey.. i did a lot of video blogging with my bebs and adik angkat Hazwan.. hahaha..

Arse him.. hahaha..

suke ehk dpt dgn Ashriqah.. hahaha..

anws.. im gonna update it soon... so enjoy the craziness times of us in Melacca.

Let the party begin...

Last day in SG

2008-12-26T00:29:00.000+08:00

Today is the last day im staying in SG. Gonna leave my dearest in SG. I feel really happy of going out with my family but really sad at the same time. Leaving someone that you really love is the most difficult thing in life even though it is a 3 day trip only. At the same time. I'm sorry for breaking his promises again. im sorry dear. Im too friendly. i like making new friends. But not searching boy-friends. seriously. Im not like that. I'm gonna miss him so much. haiz. In another 5 hours more im leaving SG to Melacca for 3 days 2 nights. I hope i won't cry in the bus. I would always be thinking of you dear. haiz... hopefully i wont spoil the mood there. oh well let's end it here. it's time for me to sleep then. i miss you so much dear. n i miss Singapore...

Lyrics to : like a knife (Secondhand Serenade)

2008-12-20T04:57:00.000+08:00

i did a lot, i know you say

i've got to get away.

"The world is not yours for the taking."

Is all you ever say.

I know im not the best for you,

But promise that you'll stay.

'Cause if i watch you go,

You'll see me wasting, you'll see me wasting away.

'Cause today, you walked out of my life

'Cause today, your words felt like a knife

Im not leaving this life

Goodbyes are meant for lonely people standing in the rain

And no matter where i go it's always pouring all the same.

These streets are filled with memories

Both good for detected pain

And all i wanna do is love you

But Im the only one to blame

'Cause today, you walked out in my life

'Cause today , your words felt like a knife

Im not leaving this life

But what do I know, if your leaving

All you did was to stop the bleeding

But this scars will stay forever

And this words have no meaning

If we cannot find the feeling

That we hold on together

Try your hardest to remember

Stay with me,

Or watch me bleed

I need you just to breathe.

'Cause today, you walked out of my life

(Stay with me, or watch me bleed)

'Cause today, your words felt like a knife

(I need you just to breathe.)

Im not leaving this life

The love of my life.

2008-12-19T04:28:00.000+08:00

It's our 6 months anniversary.

I would like to make this wish for us.

Hoping that this relationship would last forever till we could see each other again after life.

All my life...

I never met someone like you.

Even though we had lots of ups and downs together,

I would always love you no matter what.

In our relationship.

You made me realize how immature i am and not thinking things twice as you say.

You have thought me things to care for people and control the one you love so much.

You really do prove me that you do love me.

I hope that no any other unfortunate events would ever occur to us again.

InsyaAllah.

In future ahead us.

i hope things would last long forever between us till our time has come.

I love you so much Dear.

i can't stop thinking of you.

Im Crazy in love with you.

reading back your msg u kept in my laptop was the most memorable thing in my mind.

i loveyou dear...

Seriously i do..

Still hurt and trying to forgive it.

2008-12-18T13:16:00.000+08:00

I feel bad for my ownself.

Feel so demoralised of myself.

feeling that im the worst GF ever.

maybe to my friends im not.

But to me...

im making his life so miserable with me and so heart aching.

Why m i still doing this to him.

i have broken his promise.

im sorie for breaking it.

i love you so much.

i should have not done it.

i have deleted my friendster account the second time again.

hmm.. i thot i have done it so.

but..

nevermind.

It gives me lots of headaches and problems to it.

seeing it makes me more in pain.

So i have deleted it.

Maybe starting a new life in friendster?.

just Maybe.

i hope you are happy with it now.

you could enjoy yourself commenting other people from now on.

just have a great time commenting k.

i don't want to control this anymore.

Just go do what you wanna do.

im not going to stop you but i would feel hurt.

Sorie seems to be the hardest word to say.

and there is no other ways for you to believe me.

No matter what.

The only thing that i could do is.

To make my trust back again to you.

im sorie.

I love you.

im missing you so much.

meeting you was the happiest and greatest thing in my life.

Please forgive me.

Love.Confused.Pain.Suffering

2008-12-16T11:11:00.000+08:00

Been thinking so much about you...

i miss you so much...

i've been so deeply in pain recently...

not really because of you...

but because of me...

I feel like im the creature that kills people hearts and ate them...

I really don't understand why do you still want to be with me...

Even though you had lots of them...

They deserve to be with you...

They want you so much...

I don't know if you still remember my Birthday?...

Cz i do remember yours...

We all hafto come to a point that how deeply your love is?...

Maybe...

Just maybe...

We were not Fated together?...

Just maybe...

im telling you...

i had enough of this feeling so much...

Feel like walking away from it...

Im sorry if you have to return back and feeling so down and lonely...

I know i had cause you enough problem...

It's my fault that you became so Angry and irritated by me...

But why do you still hafto be with me...

i really felt that you really deserve to be with someone special...

I may nt be the one...

But one day you would fine the one you actually love...

would come true...

This world is full of Preety, Handsome but lots of Ugly situation...

If you thing wad im typing here is wrong...

im sorie...

what im saying here is the fact..

The fact that is happening in my life...

I consider myself....

haix...

Ugly and useless...

im tired now...

to much too type and explain the feeling im having...

im sorie if you are reading this...

xoxo...

missing you so much....

Confused

2008-12-15T01:36:00.000+08:00

it's the 3rd day now.

he's still there and would be back on friday.

i miss him..

i really do...

but i dunnoe if he is still having the same feeling towards me now...

or is it me that having the weird feeling...

m i in the wrong?

i don't kniw.

maybe im too much.

maybe.

i hate myself.

i really think that he deserves to be with someone else better than me.

or maybe he is still thinking about her?

i don't know...

im confused.

im like having this confused feeling...

it won't stop.

haiz...

we'l c how everything shall go.

Another fallen step

2008-12-14T01:19:00.000+08:00

Ok... most probably it's my fault and i can't handle it anymore...

i can't stop looking at his friendster...

and i can't stop thinking about it...

Do you really love me?

are you serious with me?

are u just here toying with my heart?

i can't stop thinking of the problem..

Your not short k

your handsome and good looking..

and every girls...

really seeking for your attention...

im seeing myself not good enough for you...

many girls out there are super Gorgeous and wonderful than me..

Y me?

y me?

you just go ahead k..

im like shit..

ur still thinking of her..

i noe it..

i dun think you really think much of me...

your thinking of her too...

im sorie...

i just can't go on like this...

i think i hafto leave you..

i feel like crying here...

im sorie...

Just go on with her aite...

im sorie...

she understand you more than me...

im sorie...

It still hurts inside.

2008-12-13T08:26:00.000+08:00

why m i still not sure of myself...

this pain is still buryig inside of me...

i know i have forgiven you.. but i couldn't forget what you had done...

why?

i feel bad of myself..

i feel like im the worst gf for you...

i was so bz with my skewl projsect...

im sorie for not always talking to you...

but why?...

can't you understand me?

i didn't even do that toward you...

haiz...

please cure my achimg heart that you had done...

i can't get rid of this pain...

it's bleeding to much inside of me...

i sounded like im going to die soon on this blog...

please...

if you don't want me say it..

don't force yourself loving me k..

I love you so much..

but why do you hafto do this to me..

why?

Morning

2008-12-13T08:00:00.000+08:00

It's in the morning.. n im still not asleep...

im thinking of you every hour, mins and seconds...

hoping that you could listen,

to the sound of my heart beat that awaits for you...

Waiting for you here...

no matter what..

i'll be right by your side no matter you are...

My love for you is growing deeper than ever before..

That this love has made me so into you that i couldn't hardly speak for myself...

Baby...

you were the only guy that i wish to stay long with and be with forever and ever...

this aren't the sweet words or the sweetest thoughts of a charming snake..

not here to please your heart..

but this emotion or feelings toward you...

has no better word to describe or explain...

baby...

i love you so much...

i pray for your safely return back to Singapore..

i'll be waiting for you here..

im missing you so much here...

I LOVE MY SYED MUHD. HAZIQ <3<3<3

much much loves to him..

my honey..

my bf...

my love of my life...

Cupcakes "Day 1"

2008-12-13T04:35:00.000+08:00

i've change the pics..

kind of lame and not preeetty satisfied.

well im currently happily doing my cupcakes with my brothers at this hour.

at this freakinghour..

ohhh...

well..

just to get rid of my emotional senses and loneliness here..

wish you were here..

if you could hear me..

*This is like how it all started...

got soo much ingredients to do it.. But i din't do it alone.. With the help of my dear brothers..

Haziq and Syafiq.. hahaha.. it's damn fun and interesting.. hahaha...

* and a little help from my mum in decorating

hahaha...

i could start doing my own business now...

selling cupcakes online...

hehe..

i really would love to do it...

i hope one day lah...

im still under training doing this cupcakes..

my mum ask me to focus on one first...

oh well...

wait for it in 3 years time...

hahaha...

oh well this is the first day now. im missing him so much alredi.. been missing him so much eversince yesterday... haiz... please come home safely k baby... im missing you so much here...

im so hapy to hear what you have said to me the other day. Insyaallah we could last long aitez... As long you don't go breaking my heart aite...

Oh yarh.. i'l keep for you some cupcakes aite after your return.. don't forget me kk.

loving you always and would never stop thinking of you...

I LOVE YOU SYED MUHD HAZIQ!!!

Hope you could hear me from NOW!!!!

2008-12-12T15:00:00.000+08:00

i love you.

i miss you so much here rite now.

Today is the day that he is leaving SG for 4/5 days.

i have to take good care of myself alone now.

i'l wait for him no matter what.

i promise him that i would never do or go anything/anywhere ta break his heart.

i'l wait for you baby.

after reading the msg that he had save in my laptop.

i felt bad of myself and sorry for him.

im like torturing his life.

m i a heartbreaker?

m i irritating to you.

do u hate me?

do u love me?

if you hate me i understand.

im too sensitive and emotional.

pls dun leave me baby.

i love you so much.

you r different then any guys that i've met.

i have forgive you.

just don't do it again/

im very sensitive to what things had happen.

maybe it's my fault.

i didn't gave you much attention maybe.

haiz...

i think im the worst gf for you.

do you think so?

haiz.

i get so demoralize of myself.

anws.

no matter what happen.

i love you baby.

you help me out when i was drunk.

and you recorded me talking drunk.

hahaha..

i was shock at first and damn paisey.

haha...

but this is my first time a guy taking care of me wen im drunk.

i never allow any guy touch me or take care of me wen im drunk.

only my gfs do that to me.

i love you baby.

i miss you.

can't wait ta go out with you again.

2008-11-29T19:34:00.001+08:00

In with the new.. out with the old..

2008-11-18T10:42:00.000+08:00

leaving the old was the hardest thing to do;
can't stop remembering what you have done to me.
lovin you was the greatest thing to do;
but hurting me was the painful thing to see.

Why do you have to do this to me;
and why couldn't you just say the truth about it.
you have broken my heart like a melting ice;
that love that you gave me has slowly faded away with it.

I've ended my chapter here together with you;
i need to move on and to start a new.
never to look back to be with you;
coz things won't be the same anymore coz i have someone new.

bit my lips.

2008-06-13T04:37:00.000+08:00

I dun get it.
haiz. i feel so frustrated and mad wit him.
he knows that i wanna mit him nxt week.
then i told him dat i've gt shootings nxt week.
well it's a 3/4 days shoot.
doesn't mean i've gt shoot means dat i cant see him after this 3/4 days of shoot.
i just feel like asking him to X-ray my heart.
i know he is an experience guy.
i noe im nt DAT experience in relationship.
My relationship has always the ups and downs.
Today,
im gonna mit my fren to hand in the final touch uo fof the video editing for this wedding and maybe i'l mit my boyfie later.
*if i remember.
Everyday i would always think about him
and think wen cld i spent more time wit him.
The funny thing is dat,
wen im busy,
he's free.
wen he's busy,
im free...
then he's like blaming me having bad scheduling of dates on wen meeting him or skewl, project,werk whatever in my life that includes time, submission and money.
well, im still young, i noe.
i noe what is called "Time Management".
Everybody needs that.
Bt im a patient person. i cld endure this things.
bt if it is too much den i would "BURST" out.
Later after he finish doing his Friday Prayers.
Me and him are going to mit and go take "Satays" at Bukit Timah/Panjang.
Which i dun noe where is the place.
u see.
the problem is this.

i told him that in the afternoon, im totally free until nite arnd 7.30pm. i cld only go out wit him in the afternoon. he's like nt satisfied. haiz...
i dun get him.
den i told him that for the BBQ pti event would strt at 4.30pm. and at the meantime, my "MOTHER", says that she wans to bring me out for my Birtday party in advance at a Pizza Hut she told me. Damn. Pizza Hut for a Party at my age. is she serious?
well anw. i told her that who shall take wad and where would we meet up. He says that y not i help. he ask. so actually hw did u guys planned at first.

i told him. well, two of my G friends wld meet each other at Bukit Panjang to take the "Satays" then get a cab to Bedok North to help out this Gal hu claims that she noes everything about BBQ. *Which she doesn't. Anws. frm there we go to pasir ris park to set up our stuff. Then suddenly. He strtd raising his voice at me and i was a bit Frustrated. He told me. wouldn't that be wasting a lot of money. Then i say yeah bt meanwhile during that time we didnt get any GUYS help to offer their transportation to do it. so we'll just use Public transport that the gov is willing to do for the public. So he says that. I help okie. me and you go get the "Satays" and the other G frenz of mine head dwn to Bedok North to help the noe it all gal tp Pasir Ris Park. Then i said. okie bt. This plan at first, i didnt paln it wit Nora. Cz she is the one planning. He says that. so. U help her lah. We do dis getting the "Satays" and at the same time we could mit up. By doing this we cld kill 2 birds with one stone. to me.. he has apoint. bt the most irritating part is that. Must he has to Raise hos voice at me? Wad did i do. Okie at first i was pissed off wit him that he was coming home late. n frm there he told me that he has lots of werk to be done. so he ask me to wait for a FEW mins.
to me FEW mins is 10 mins. The time wen msg me was at 11.30pm. Then he calls me at 12.45pm. Do u noe hw fed up i am. i nid ta finish up my editing and emails nd here comes him telling m. Y did u pick up ur phone late? What made u so busy? Why are so angry to me? Well hello.. im pissed wit u cz u told me that to wait for U A FEW MINS. HAIZ... i just feel like taking a hammer and just Hammer dwn his head. So frm there. i cldnt sleep. Due to things that is happening i my mind. everyday i feel tired. i just need lots of rest. but things keeps on coming and coming. This is not my first time sleeping late like this. I hate sleeping late. cz it'll make my skin oily and having lots of body ache. I dunno wether he understands wad im going through now. so to whoever reads this blog. im sorry. cz im just being frustrated about things. i just wanna throw my anger out to somewhere i cld elease all this tension in me. i noe it is a long Blog that i just wrote. im just pissed and so on so forth. Dot.Dot.Dot.
Thx u all for reading this blog bt i noe it's kind of lame. yarhh. Sorry if any of these incident is related to ur life too. bt this is wad im going through now. haha
how i wish i cld be like one of my frenz blog. updating her story life with panties and bras and ppl that she's arnd
wel
diff ppl has diff way of typing in blogs.
alrite den
i'l end me crap shits here.
Nazurah NOH.
pissed off by things that is around her.
is TRYING to go to sleep...

2008-06-11T03:07:00.000+08:00

okie. finally i have done doing my skin. alright it's kind of simple. hehehe. well, hu cares anws. haha. as long i could update my life now. haha.

okie. we'l strt our story here.

actually, i felt really sad and hurt to hear my mum insulting me.
i dunno if she likes me or loves me as a daughter.
okie. she does buys for me my birthdae gift in advance.
my brand new hp. Sony Ericsson Walkman (W380i)
okie. it doesnt has any video camera in it but only photo taking arh. well who cares.
as long i could listen to my fav song everyday. woo hoo..

okie baq to what i wanna say.

i just felt that she's releasing her anger and tension to me.
i dont know whether she supports me in whatever im doing.
everytime i step out of the hse, she strts to say dat im lyk using this house as a hotel.
well she was wrg. i was having lots of skewl project and events shoot to think about.
she thinks dat u should only focus on dancing. which i dun believe wad my heart says.
every nite. i stay up late. thinking.
why is she so mean and not threating me like she use to be.
wad wrg have i done to her now.
i know i did hurt ur feeling last tym.
but i've changed and overcome my childhood pains wen "ayah" leave us.
i thot i was strg enuff baq then.
bt i've changed.
i realise that i hafto grow up and be a woman.
i hafto stnd up for my rites.
bt,
do u really hafto make me feel so empty inside wen im wit u.
i dun see where is she anymore.
i dun feel her loving and careness towards me n my brothers.
i dunno who u r now.
i know u r my mum.
but.
for a glance,
the next thing is,
she is just a 'Mum'
but,
not the 'Mother'
i use to have and love.

2008-06-11T01:58:00.001+08:00

hola!